Clearing out the cobwebs

One of the biggest problems with not blogging for a while is that I’m largely incapable of declaring things as “water under the bridge” and just moving on from that point forward. Every time I fire up the blogulator, I feel like I need to recap all four of my readers on everything that’s happened and it just becomes too daunting of a task. So I don’t write anything. Which means I have even more to recap the next time I try. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. Blarg.

I’d really like to get back into this again, so here’s an attempt to recap at least some of the things that have happened over the past couple of months. It’s nowhere near complete, but it should be good enough to lift the shroud of guilt which weighs so heavily upon my soul.

• I don’t want to jinx anything, but the kids have been playing together pretty well recently. I think The Boy has finally decided that The Girl is interesting enough to play with from time to time.
• A day of shopping with The Wife led to the discovery of disturbing items for sale at our local Spec’s, Dillard’s and Hallmark.
• I accused The Wife of having a jacket that looked like Leonard McCoy’s from Star Trek V, but it turns out that I was extremely wrong about it. Obviously, I was thinking about the jacket Martin Sheen wore in Badlands.
• We packed up the kids and spent a day at the zoo, which turned out to be a big hit with The Girl.
• Unfortunately, walking though the primates exhibit did not help The Wife figure out how to open a banana at our picnic lunch.
• The Boy risked his life to impress a girl at the playground…only to lose any cool points he might have earned after getting pwned by his two-year-old sister just minutes later.
• Speaking of playgrounds, if The Girl is on one, there’s now about a 90% chance she’s saying, “I do monkey. Pick me up.“
• It’s probably a good time to buy stock in paper towel companies, because The Girl has decided that she likes to help me make my tea.
• There’s never a shortage of cheap entertainment at our house in the evenings.
• The Dog continues to have no shame.
• Easter happened, which meant there was plenty of egg dyeing. The Boy managed to create one that was disturbingly flesh-colored. Once we all got over being grossed out by it, hunting of the eggs ensued.
• They finally tore down the Cinema, wiping away a large part of my childhood in the process. I managed to grab a few pieces to take home with me.
• Why just sit at a picnic table when you can lounge in style?
• All it takes are a few jelly beans to make The Girl get a little tipsy.
• The Girl discovered the worst hiding spot ever.
• It’s baseball season again, which means plenty of snow cones for everyone. The Boy has played extremely well this year, but quite frankly, his team sucks so they’ve lost just about every game so far. (And no – I’m not coaching this season, so we can’t blame me.)
• They finally completed the giant riverboat they’ve been building next to my office. Paddles come in next week.
• The Boy and I participated in the excitement of bingo night at his school. As usual, we won nothing.
• The Wife and The Boy got their run on at quite possibly the worst managed race I’ve ever seen. More on that in a subsequent blog post one of these days.
• The Girl created the culinary masterpiece that is the Teddy Graham sandwich.
• The Dog’s tongue says hello.
• We gathered up the kids again and headed out to the Bush Library to take a gander at the spring flowers. During our afternoon out, I took a picture that I’m seriously thinking about submitting to Awkward Family Photos.
• Sure signs of spring: rabbits in the backyard and feral pasta in the break room at work.
• There was a sale on peanut butter.
• I got suckered into being the only parent who volunteered to spend a magical Friday evening at our Little League concession stand. Brought back some good memories of my childhood though.
• My little brother is getting married in less than two weeks. That’s kind of weird to think about. I used to change his diapers.
• We’ve managed to line up quite the family tour for 2010. In the next six months, at least one of us will be headed to Baltimore, Denver, San Francisco, Providence and Cincinnati. If you’re hometown isn’t listed, don’t worry. We’re adding additional shows all the time.
• And a whole lot of other stuff. Details on some of it forthcoming. As for the rest…blah. Water under the bridge.

Fries at the bottom of the bag

• You think this blog hasn’t been updated in a while? Check out our baseball league’s site.
• Adobe has a funny definition of “enhancements.”
• When it comes to collegiate licensed board shorts, don’t settle for crap.
• CNN has been up to their old tricks again…or that health care bill wasn’t as big we all thought.
• Looks like we’ve finally found a beneficial side effect of cigarettes.
• I hope this delau didn’t keep kids from their English classes.
• I wonder if the Allied troops spent time contemplating ways to make their efforts sicker and doper for the enjoyment of future generations.
• It pays to compare prices before buying.
• Dear Google News: might be time to work on that thumbnail algorithm again.
• Watch out for those German Shermans.
• I suspected that MLB was force-feeding me feel-good stories about horrible franchises, but apparently I was wrong. I mean, doing third-best in a six-year span is big news, right?
• Bought a DVD the other day and found an ad inside that has me excited about the future of primetime television.
• When writing an article about city council activities, feel free to throw the reader a bone and mention which city you’re talking about.
• Dear Facebook: when I’m looking at The Wife’s profile, this is probably the last ad you should be serving up on the side over there.