Schlimiel, schlimazel, hasenpfeffer incorporated

I don’t have tickets to an Alice Cooper concert, but I am headed to Milwaukee. In fact, if you’re reading this after 6:30 p.m., I’m already there.

Well, allegedly. You know how these things generally go. I’ve got to take three planes to get there and I’m sure at least one of them will be running behind and foul everything up.

And why am I going to beautiful, sunny Milwaukee? Because I’m attending the 2009 HighEdWeb conference, something that probably doesn’t interest any of you, but I’m pretty excited about it. Hopefully I’ll learn some useful stuff and meet some interesting people this week. At the very least, I’ll escape from the office for five whole work days. That right there is reason enough to spend an entire Saturday traversing the continental United States on a series of planes.

Speaking of being on a plane all day, I did something really dumb this week. On Tuesday, I went to the doctor and let him remove a couple of cysts on my back. (Well, that’s putting it nicely. Basically he scooped a chunk out of my back and stuffed it full of gauze since it couldn’t be stitched up.) I am really looking forward to being stuck on tiny planes all day and not being able to let my back touch the seat because of the stabbing pain caused by my quasi-open wound. Also, because of all the bandaging I’ve got a pretty suspicious bulge sticking out of my back and I’m sure some zealous security official will feel the need to inspect it. Wunderbar.

When I told co-workers and other various people this week where I was going, they all seemed a little disappointed. No one seems to get too worked up about poor little Milwaukee. I’m going to give a chance, though. I enjoy going new places.

I’ve only got two regrets going in:

1. Due to the timing of the conference and the end of the baseball season, I won’t be able to take a tour of Miller Park liked I had originally planned. That’ll make three ballparks that I haven’t been able to see this year. (We were in New York a few weeks before both of their new ballparks opened in March.)
2. I’m heading to the land of sausage, beer and cheese right in the middle of my concerted push to slim down.

These regrets are negated, however, by the following:

1. The weather for the entire I’m going to be there is supposed to be cool and rainy – just how I like it.
2. I’ll be in Wisconsin when the Packers take on Brett Favre on Monday night. I’m going to try and find a sports bar somewhere and watch the insanity.

If I do make it to Milwaukee tonight, then you’ll have an update waiting for you tomorrow morning. If not, well, then I guess it depends on whether whatever airport I’m stuck in offers free wi-fi or not.