Movie reviews in 10 words or less
It’s time for another round of movie reviews. (For those of you thinking, “Another?,” the first one was way back in May.)
As usual, it’s all old crap because I don’t get out much. Or at all. Whatever.
Here’s the latest round of experiments on the Satellite of Love:
- Star Wars: The Clone Wars: Aimed solely at kids. Pretty good for what it is.
- Judgment Night: Not great, not horrible. Just kind of there.
- Westworld: Jurassic Park with robots instead of dinos. Very slow.
- The Italian: Incredibly bleak, but ultimately uplifting. A wonderful movie.
- The Magnificent Seven: Great cast, great story, great acting, great film.
- Next: Cage and Moore phone it in on this dud.
- The House Bunny: Remember Clueless? Imagine it sucked.
- Company Business: Almost gets interesting, but never quite does.
- Shocker: Total crap, but so bad it’s funny.
- Max Payne: Mark Wahlberg deserves better than scripts than this.
- Backdraft: Plot takes backseat to character development, still pretty good.
- C.S.A.: The Confederate States of America: Tried to be thought-provoking, just felt juvenile.
Fries at the bottom of the bag
- Good to see that CNN is still asking the important grammatically incorrect questions that other news outlets won’t.
- If you’ve always wanted to look like a caveman clubbed you on the back of the head, good news – there’s finally a solution for you!
- Uh, Dave, I think something funny is going on with the radar…
- I wonder how this works? Can you just redeem the coupon for that extra quality?
- Thank goodness someone had the foresight to start posting news for my iPhone app back in 1873. Wish they’d update a little more frequently though…
- August is in the can, so here’s the monthly photo gallery. Some of those pics will show up in future WWs. You’ve been warned.